I was driving from Council Bluffs to see my patients when the thought settled in: everything in life naturally moves toward breakdown. Cars. Roofs. Systems. Relationships. Entropy isn’t an enemy we have to invite in — it comes unannounced, simply by neglect.

But here is the part worth sitting with. Solid things — cars, homes, structures — wear down from the outside in. Weather. Time. Use. Relationships are different. They decay from the inside out. The rot is internal. Quiet. And by the time it’s visible, it has already been working for a while.

Relational entropy doesn’t announce itself with noise. It poisons slowly — through unspoken resentment, unresolved conflict, passivity, avoidance. Left unchecked, it doesn’t just weaken connection; it corrupts it.

The bridge

There’s a moment in The Fellowship of the Ring I keep coming back to. The monster is advancing. Frodo is vulnerable. And Gandalf steps onto the bridge, turns, and faces the threat head-on.

He doesn’t negotiate. He doesn’t hope it turns away. He plants himself and declares, with authority and passion: “You shall not pass.”

And the monster stops.

That is the posture entropy requires — especially in the relationships we care about. Not passive maintenance. Not vague good intentions. Deliberate, passionate resistance. A recognition that the threat is real, and that we have both the responsibility and the authority to confront it.

Not here. Not this. Not us.

Avoiding decay isn’t accidental. It’s an act of leadership. It is our duty to recognize it early, to name it, and to stand against it with clarity and conviction. Without that stance, the negative consequences are guaranteed — even if their exact shape isn’t known yet.

Responsibility doesn’t just require awareness. It requires passion. And the willingness to stand on the bridge and say: Not here. Not this. Not us.

So here is my encouragement this week — and I’d rather you think it through for yourself than take my word for it. Pick one relationship that matters to you. Ask honestly: is anything quietly working on it from the inside? You’ll know the answer faster than you expect. And if there is — don’t wait for it to announce itself. Step onto the bridge.

— Reggie